A Book Give-Away--and 3 Book Reviews--for Nat. Family Caregivers Month

In honor of National Family Caregivers Month, here are three new books for caregivers that would make excellent holiday gifts. The first is a beautiful hardcover memoir in cartoon form that I’m giving away in a drawing.

1. “Can’t We Talk About Something More Pleasant?” by Roz Chast

 

2. “When Caring Takes Courage: A Compassionate, Interactive Guide for Alzheimer’s and Dementia Caregivers,” by Mara Botonis,

 

and 

3. “On Pluto: Inside the Mind of Alzheimer’s,” by Greg O’Brien

Check out my reviews of these books, and how you can enter a drawing to win a copy of "Can't We Talk About Something More Pleasant?" on caregivers.com here.

My 50th Birthday, and What Mom Taught Me

Mom was so proud when I finally graduated from college at age 27Today is my 50th birthday, guys, and I'm thinking a lot about my mom, Judy, who passed away almost two years ago.

Fifty years ago this morning Mom was playing the piano through the early stages of labor. She hoped that I would be a girl, as she wanted a daughter badly. In our living room at our piano she was most likely alone, as my father struggled with mental illness and was in his own world even if he was in the house, and my brother, 12 years older than me, was in school. Through the pain of labor my mother sought beauty and comfort in music. Years later, through her struggle with dementia she sought serenity and comfort in the company of other people--me, her grandchildren, her facility staff, and anyone else lucky enough to enjoy her beautiful smile and bright blue eyes. 

If you've read my book you know that Mom was a recovering alcoholic in my teen years, and that we had a rocky relationship all our lives. It was only through caregiving that we truly grew close and became friends.

Of course dementia caregiving is not all roses and sunsets, but those eight years at Mom's side taught me to appreciate simple moments of tenderness, the way her love for me--and mine for her--endured even if she couldn't remember or say my name. 

This morning I made a list of all the things I'm grateful for as I hit the mid-century mark. Although Mom was a flawed, complex character (as am I), she taught me many lessons I will carry with me always. I write about many of those lessons in my book, but for now I just want to say Thank you, Mom, and I miss you so much today.

Advice for Dementia Caregivers: My Podcasts on Lifestyle Improvement Radio

Download the podcasts below to listen to an interview about my book, "Inside the Dementia Epidemic: A Daughter's Memoir," with Lifestyle Improvement Radio. Rebeca, above, asked me lots of interesting questions about my eight-year journey caring for Mom, and recorded our discussion as two 30-minute podcasts. Here are the links and the topics we discuss:

Part one:

• How I got to the place where I accepted that my mother needed help and that I needed to provide that help
• What it was like for my mother to live with me and my family, and why we decided that assisted living was the best option 
• Overcoming the guilt I felt moving my mother into a facility
• Some of the things that Mom taught me over my years of caring for her
• How writing was a way to address the frustrations of caregiving and to heal some of those feelings

 Part two:

• How caregiving affected my health
• Some lesser-known risk factors for Alzheimer’s disease (such as sleep apnea and high blood sugar)
• Why exercise is the best antidote for Alzheimer's (although there is no proven way to prevent the disease
• Why I was a reluctant caregiver
• How caregiving brought us closer and helped us overcome our challenging relationship as mother and daughter
• Key advice I would give anyone who is just beginning to be a caregiver for a person with dementia

I hope you have a chance to listen to these recordings and that you enjoy them. Feel free to leave a comment below.

Have a great week!

Best Books About Dementia and Caregiving

photo from the blog "The Generation Above Me"Are you looking for recommendations for books about Alzheimer's, dementia or dementia caregiving? Karen D. Austin of the popular blog "The Generation Above Me" has posted a list of her favorite dementia-related books, with links to her longer reviews of those books. I'm honored to have "Inside the Dementia Epidemic: A Daughter's Memoir" included. Thank you, Karen. What a lovely surprise this evening!

Karen writes:

"Even though my approach to aging is pretty broad, I have a persistent interest in cognition. Not only do I read about healthy, normal, age-related changes to the brain, I also read about change caused by disease.

"I am particularly interested in how dementia changes a person's cognition and how caregivers respond.

"I have read more than a dozen books (novels, reference books, memoirs, etc.), and I hope to read many more.

"Here are some quick reviews of some of these books with links to longer reviews. I plan on updating this page as I read more.

"1. Dosa, David (2010). Making the Rounds with Oscar. The author describes residents of a skilled nursing center who are moving into late-stage dementia and how their loved ones are responding to the challenges."

Read the rest of Karen's recommendations here.

New "Evermind" Technology Can Help Supervise Elders Living Alone

Mom and my son at her cottage around the time I began to worry about her living aloneI rarely review products on this blog (just dementia-related books), but I was approached by Evermind, a new company that makes an intriguing tool to help caregivers supervise the well-being of their loved ones who live alone. It's something that I wish had existed 10 years ago when Mom lived by herself in her isolated cottage on a lake. This simple piece of technology can help reassure you that your loved one is out of bed and going about their usual routine by monitoring their use of electrical appliances.  

Here's how it works: A small, white Evermind box plugs into a wall outlet or power strip, with the appliance plugged into the box. Using built-in wireless Internet, Evermind alerts you if the appliances your loved one normally uses each day have not been turned on or off. Compatible appliances include microwave ovens, coffee makers, TVs, lamps, curling irons, CPAP machines, garage door openers and more. No home Internet connection is required.

For more information, read my review on caregivers.com, or visit Evermind.us.